Saturday, June 18, 2011

The Twins Move Back Into the Playboy Mansion

Just days after Crystal Harris calls off the wedding to Hugh Hefner, Hugh’s ex-girlfriends the twins Karissa and Kristina Shannon tell TMZ they are moving back into the Playboy mansion.

Surprise, the mansion swapped out one blonde chick for two new ones. It’s a well-oiled machine over at Playboy headquarters. When they lose one playmate they immediately replace her with two younger models.

Hef was probably super confused when he saw the twins. He probably thought Crystal Harris returned with a clone, blinked a couple times, and realized oh, it’s those twins I owned in 2008. Welcome back girls, what were your names again?

Not only did Karissa move back into the mansion today, she also broke up with her boyfriend of almost a year, Smallville actor Sam Jones, this morning. Imagine how much it would suck to be dumped by your girlfriend for an 85-year-old man?

Karissa and Sam Jones shared a sex tape and even a rap song together. Their song “Juice and Vodka,” was “released” last week and features Karissa doing some talk-sing Key$ha wannabee bullsh-t while her now ex-boyfriend raps about well, juice and vodka.

Juice and vodka is what you drink in college when there’s nothing left in your fridge except for half a handle of Popov vodka and maybe some vitamin water. Amateurs.

Well, since the sex tape and music career didn’t really launch any success for the playmate twins, I guess it’s time to go back to their favorite geriatric relationship.

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